Facebook, Friends And High School-Friend Or Foe?

High school for me wasn’t all that long ago,  only seven years in fact. I remember it well.

Back in those days Facebook and Twitter never existed.  They were but a glimmer in Mark Zuckerburg’s and Jack Doresy’s eyes respectively. MySpace was only just starting to take off, or at least it was still a novelty in the UK at that time. I remember setting up my MySpace page and immediately adding all my close friends. I was never fussed about befriending (yes, BE-friending, there is no such word as “friending!”) those I didn’t speak to or interact with personally. Social media was new, no one wanted to be stepping on the toes of people that they were not particularly close to by adding them to online networks and then snooping at their profiles. It just wasn’t the done thing ten years ago, not at 13 or 14.

Times Change

Time went on, we matured, left school  and started our lives as young adults. Social media was in the back ground getting  bigger and better. By the time University came, everyone I knew had Facebook. More to the point, even people I didn’t know were on there and connecting with me and my friends. It was not uncommon to walk out of class or lecture and hear the words,

I’ll find you on Facebook”.

The old uncertainty of etiquette between friends in real life and then again in a virtual sense were long gone. It was now acceptable to request the friendship of people you barely knew or didn’t know at all! People, particularly those of us who have grown up with social media from a young age, no longer cared. Social networks were the easiest, cheapest and most fun way to stay in touch and meet knew people.

Last year, having left  school far behind, I browsed over my Facebook. And who was on my friends list? All the people that ten years ago I didn’t care about having on my profile. Old school acquaintances, people I’d met once or twice, people who had shared lectures with me but never spoken to. The funny thing was, I knew almost everything about them. I knew more about these people now than I ever did when I saw them daily. It’s not that I was upset by their lives, their updates and photos, it’s very simply that I just didn’t care. The best of luck to them and I wish them well, but I don’t need or want to know the ins and outs of their lives. I’m sure they don’t want to know about mine either. I culled a hundred or so people and didn’t think twice about it. Give it ago, it’s gives you a childish sense of liberation.

Facebook, Stay Connected

Let me end this on a positive note. Facebook is what helps keeps my and friends together. Meals and drinks out are all decided on Facebook, no one wants to ring around 20 people planning a big event! I can see when a friend needs a shoulder to cry on, when birthdays need planning, when the hottest group events will be. I check it every day for news and updates. Although Facebook can be intrusive at times, it is, in its rawest form, a place where you can keep in touch and stay friends. I always accept requests from people I know. I give them the opportunity to inspire me, to talk to me, say something funny or thoughtful. Last year, I had a request from the boy who sat behind me in high school. I accepted. We were always civil and polite to one another at school but were in different friendship groups so never really interacted. To my surprise, he immediately started talking to me, “long time no see, how are you?” etc.  This year we celebrate our first anniversary. Now, had it not been for Facebook re-uniting us seven years after high school finished,  him and me would never have happened.

Social media, it’s swings and round-a-bouts!